i try hard not to fantasize...

I try hard not to fantasize
whose reality is it that i keep,
when i prepare to lay in bed...
thinking ahead i am there to sleep.
Suddenly finding myself awake,
with memories that seem to creep...
Holding me with wishes,
i wasn't alone but snuggling close...
With someone loved especially there,
just for me to never leave and love most.
Whose reality is this that i keep,
when i feel i try hard not to fantasize.
Or make attempts not to lie to myself.


Lawrence S. Pertillar